"I get knocked down, but I get up again"

This song suddenly popped into my head as I was sitting here feeling sorry for myself. As a general rule, I try not to dwell on the negatives going on in my life. I fare better if I sort of block them out and don't deal with them on a minute-by-minute basis. That's not to say I live in fantasy land. I do "deal" with the bad stuff, but when there's too much of it, my coping mechanism is to file it all away in a remote, yet accessible, place rather than constantly think and talk about it. There's a lot of crappy stuff going on all around me.....some stuff I'm "livin' it", but mostly the bad stuff is happening to people I love. I feel helpless; my heart aches....unbelievably aches. I can't do much but pray. Even that strikes me as pointless when it seems every good thing that happens is promptly followed up with something bad. Lately I've been wondering why bother. I know I have many things I'm thankful for, but at times those wonderful things get overshadowed by the tremendous emotional roller coaster and stress I'm under right now. You could say this is a really difficult season of life, and at times (like today) I know it's not me "hanging on", but God holding me in the palm of His hand lest I slip away.


"I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness." ~ Lamentations 3:19-23